Ciao amici!

Hello! my friends

Just call me HAPPY:) . Endlessloop is a very good friend of mine. Though we knew each other barely for a year, we clicked very well… guess... one of the reasons is we are both quite “xiao”.

FYI, in case you think I am another of your biking flock. Sorry hor! I am a chio speed “demon-lass” who get the kick out of speeding down major expressways in my red chii beamer!

Never thought of sharing my dark kept secrets of how I haunt road-users esp. the motor bikers till one fine day, my good “bruther”, Endlessloop, as usual, came to my office (I think my good friend needs his regular dosage of eye candy), “ponk” himself comfortably on the chair in front of my desk and in his very MCP mannerism told me (I really mean “tell me” not “ask me”) that I should be his guest blogger.

If he had stared into my eyes intensely with his cute doggie eyes, I would have said YES straightaway…. Moreover, No $$. No Honey.

Anyway, to cut the long story short, I am here after being bribed with 3 gifts.

If you are a regular visitor to Endlessloop blog, you should know that he created the “Hazard-Oriented Vision Theory” and is a goody-goody law abiding biker, a role model commonly cited by the TP ( Traffic Police or Ti-ko Pek??!!)….. Whereas I am totally the opposite from him. Outwardly, people tell me I am demure, feminine, gentle, cultured and did I mention chio? But in actual fact, I am a hell rider on the road who get a kick out of “qionging” red lights!!

Let me share with you my self-developed H2K2H2 driving theory tips on how to “Qiong” red lights. For those who

has “P” plate on yr car
Ride less than 1000cc bikes or less than 1000cc cars
Never drive on extreme right lane before
Never clock more than 60km/h
Never overtake other cars before
Will “ka-rang ka-bo” when see amber lights
Stop for birds to cross the road
Cannot tell the difference between a traffic police bike or a CISCO bike

These tips are not for u cos’ either you have roads~phobia or are above 50 years of age or drive not more than 20 times per year or belong to the majority blur~like~sotong women drivers.

I heard you asking me what H2K2H2 stands for?

Make a guess? Guess correctly you get a ride on my chio beamer with a chio bu beside you.

Show you my nicely manicured finger to entice you :)

Cannot guess huh?

Give hint? Clue?


Hmmmmm…..


Sorry! Happy :) will only tell u next time.


Ai ya! So late liao! I share the tips with you next time la.


So come back and read Endlessloop blog and look out for my next entry.


I WILL BE BACK!!!


Happy :)

P.S for those ah mohs or non-Singaporeans out there, let me explain what those red italics mean
Xiao~ Patient who just escape from mental hospital
Hor~ yawn
Chio~ things that cause you to drool
Chio bu~ another Ms. Universe but minus the upsize cup.
Chii ~ Chilli buddy red
Bruther ~Bi-sexual; brother with sister nature
Ponk ~ action + sound made by a droopy butt sitting heavily on the chair
Qiong or Qionging~ dash ahead like a headless chicken

Ti-ko Pek~ man fonds of exposing his genitals anywhere, anytime, anyhow
Ka lang ka bo ~ in fits
Blur like sotong ~ a land creature with multiple tentacles that cannot get accustomed to life above sea cos it was migrated from the ocean.
Ah-mohs ~ Caucasians or those Chinese who can’t speak Mandarin

Phuket On A Bike

12-13 Feb 2007

Many Singaporeans have gone to Phuket, Thailand. Phuket is famouse for its beaches, water for diving and its resorts. But few of you have travelled around Phuket on a motorbike.

I have. I shared with you my 2 days in Phuket.


Getting There By TigerAir

I choose to fly to Phuket using Tiger Airways because it is one of the cheapest, S$25 niah! Excludes airport tax; at this kind of price, you can also forget about being served any food and beverage on the flight.

But I warn you first, if you want to fly Tiger Airways, you must CHIONG for the seats one.
Because free seating. First come first serve.
So once the boarding gate is opened, all the men, women, uncle, auntie, ah gong, ah mah, ang moh, xiao jie all lose their composure and all chiong for the seats.

Tiger Airways, the survival of the fittest and fastest.

Aiyah, mai hiam (don't complain) lah. S$25 is really very cheap you know. The whole airplane got only 100 people or so. I don't know how our $2,500 total plane fare is enough to pay for the jet fuel, let alone got 2 pilots and the few stewardess and the mechanics servicing the plane.

At Phuket Airport

2 hours later, I reached Phuket airport liao.
After clearing the custom, I stood outside the airport looking for a taxi to get me to my hotel.
Before coming to Phuket, I did my research liao. And I heard that here you must dare to bargain. If not you sure become Cai Tai (cabbage) and let people chop. Means kena ka-tok.

I decided to practise my bargaining skill.

I stepped out of the airport and immediately a Thai man came to me and offer me 450 baht (1 sing dollar=23 baht) to take me to my hotel. I shake my head to indicate No, and said 200 baht.
The Thai immediately left me.

Soon, another thai man came to take his place and offer me again 450B. I thought maybe I offered too unrealistic a price the last time, so this time I offered 300B. He also left me immediately.

I tried it out on several other Thai taxi men. And finally I found a satisfactory offer and hop onto a taxi. The taxi fare remained at 450B.


Bang Tao Beach

Phuket actually got many many beaches. The one that most singaporeans go to is called Patong Beach.

I wanted to book a hotel at Patong beach also. But because I booked too late, all the hotels at Patong Beach area are fully booked.

Na bei. Must be all the kiam siap Singaporeans all flocked to Patong Beach to avoid staying in Singapore during upcoming Chinese New Year period in order to save on ang bao costs.

So I hum tum one alternate beach. The Bang Tao Beach. It is slightly north of Patong beach.

The resort I booked is called Best Western Premier Bang Tao Beach Resort & Spa. The name si eh dern (very long).















Best Western Premier Bang Tao Beach Resort & Spa.
The resort is very nice.

If you stay at Patong beach, you will have access to a very big shopping area. The downside is that Patong street and beach itself are very crowded with tourists.

Bang Tao beach is much quieter. So if you want a quiet relaxing stay just by the beach, then you might prefer Bang Tao beach.















The lazy beach of Bang Tao beach.

While I was at the resort, I noticed the people around me. First, I am the only asian staying there. The rest of the tourists are all ang mohs. I think the asians all like shopping so stay at Patong.
The second thing I noticed is that the Thai people are really thin. You can hardly find a fat Thai girl. Must be the slimming effect of all the Tom Yum soup they drink.

Renting a Motorbike

I want to go to Patong shopping area to jalan jalan. But the taxi fare cost 550B one way. Two way costs 1,110B.

Then I saw on the street, the ang moh zooming around on kup kia (small 125cc Honda wave type of motorbike). I figured they must have rented these bikes.

But I a bit worried. Wah, never ride before in Phuket, don't know I will lang-gar the traffic or the road, or not. Wait get lost how?

Then I see another few ang moh zipped past on kup kiaps, wearing no shirt, no helmet and carrying their girls behind them. Then I think, "Basket! Cannot lose to them! They got no motorcycle license also dare to ride. Back in singapore, I ride my 1,000 cc motorcycle on thousand kilometre rides to unfamilar places in malaysia, so how can I be scared now?! No balls is it?!"

I immediately walked into a shop by the road side with the sign board, Bikes for rental.

After paying 200B for 24 hour rental (so cheap!), and signing a form which basically says you die not their pua sah (not their business), I collected a filmsy helmet and the key to my bike.

Me and kup kia, my transport around Phuket.

The kup kia bike is a Yamaha. I don't know its exact model. Even though I owned and test ridden so many 600 and 1,000 cc bikes, I am a bit nervous as I have never ridden before a kup kia.

There is a choice of automatic gear or manual gear one. I asked for a manual gear one as I have never ridden before a auto bike. Good choice on hindsight as later on, I need to ride up and down some very steep slopes. And the manual gear allow me to have better engine braking going down the steep hill.

I am surprised by how light and how agile the kup kia is. The one thing I not use to is the flat 2-piece heel-and-toe gear selector. I am used to the normal motorcycle's gear selector which you use the front of your foot to step or hook below the gear level. There is also no clutch lever. The bike will never stall. It took me quite a while to get use to it.

To Patong Beach

The brown line shows you the route I took to travel from Bang Tao beach, southwards to Patong Beach. The distance is about 13 km and it takes me about 30 minutes in the day to cover.

I just ask for as many free maps from the bike rental shop. Above is one of the free maps. The maps are good enough as there is usually only one route from one beach to the other.

So I just wack and bashed towards the right direction. Along the way, when I feel lost, I just stop and ask the local Thais. "Patong? Patong?" I will say. The Thais are very helpful and they will point which direction and off I go towards where they point.

The busy streets of Patong Beach town.

Patong town is really very happening compared to Bang Tao. Everywhere are tourists, tu-tu (taxi), kup kia and sellers.















Compared to the beach of Bang Tao, the Patong beach is very very crowded.
It is so crowded that to sit on any of the chairs at the Patong beach, you need to pay.
Like machiam in Singapore you must pay for parking. Bang Tao beach is free seating.
But of course, Patong beach more happening. You see carefully above photo.
Got one person is doing para-sailing.

Shopping at Patong Town

What is there to buy at Patong you ask?
Well, you see the wordings on the T-shirt below and you can tell what are the more popular tu-chang (local produce).

What you can get at Phuket

Here, I decided to give my negotiation skill a try again.
This time I am more successful. Whatever the seller offer, I will start by countering back by one-quarter the price! Yes, one-quarter the initial offer price! So if they offer a T-shirt for 400B, I counter with 100B.

They might say no, and counter back. So the counter back-and-forth goes on. Thai people are very very friendly and smiley people. They enjoy bargaining. So don't bargain with them with a serious face. Othewise wait they give you a muay thai kick. Do your bargaining with an equally friendly smile. The best tactic is to walk away. They may call you back.

At the Patong town, you can get away with half to one-quarter the original offered price, depending on the item you are buying is commonly available or not.















Big Bikes available for rental at Patong Beach.
I don't know how much the rental is.

I was surprised to hear the growl of big cc bikes at Patong shopping area.
These are the ang mohs who rented and ride bikes like the latest Honda 600cc Fireblade. There are also R6s, 400cc shadows. But I not sure with the crowded streets of Patong and the windy country side roads, how fast can you really go on a Fireblade there.


I tried to learn some Thai words. There is the Sawadi-Krup. Which means good morning, good afternoon, good night, hello, all also can. There is also Kup-Kun-Krup which means thank you. The ending Krup is used only if you are a man. You should end with Kup as in Kup-Kun-Kup, if you are a woman or ah kua.

Alternatively, for short, just Krup. I assumed it is a short form for thank you. So I just Krup here Krup there and Krup the rest of my way in Phuket.

James Bond Island

What else is there to do at Phuket besides sun-tanning at the beach and shopping?

You must take a boat ride to the so-called James Bond Island. Why is it called James Bond Island? I think the story behind is that there was one James Bond film where they filmed at the island.

To go to James Bond Island, just sign up for a half-day or full day tour with your hotel.















The boat ride to James Bond Island.
It is very fun and the scenary is really beautiful.

The Rock.
This is the famous and amazing rock as part of the tour.

The tour includes sitting in canoes, paddled by Thai boatman.

They will take you to explore the interestingly shaped rocks and islands.
Including paddling below a very very low cave, as seen in this picture.
The two tourists in front have to lie down as they start to enter the cave with a very low ceiling!
It is very fun!

But there was one incident that made my ball shrink.
My thai boatman brought me to a quiet secluded spot to explore.
As I was marvelling at the steep walls, the Thai boatman, who is a well built young Thai (from all the paddling) asked me "Where are you from?"

As I was busy taking photographs, I nonchalently answered, "Singapore".

After I answered, I immediately realised, Oops, there was a lot of recent bad press in the newspapers saying the Thai are upset that our kay-kiang Temasek went to buy over their national jewel, Shin Corp telco. So I was a bit worried that the Thai, including this boat man, might be upset at we Singaporeans.

The Thai boat man, next said, "Singapore very rich".
Oops. Wah, how to answer?
Then he followed by, "Singapore very clever. Win the soccer asian cup. Yes?"

O-Oh. He was referring to the recent soccer finals where unexpectedly, the singapore team beat the home and hot favourite thai team to claim the championship.

Si Liao! Die! I was sure I was dead meat.
He must be upset at Singaporeans. Here I am at his mercy.
No one around me, but water.
I die here also no one will know.
I was prepared to jump over board into the water and start swimming for my dear life.

But fortunately, the Thai boatman is true to the friendly Thai attitude and such a gracious loser (not like our jeng hu). So he was just asking innocently and praising Singapore. He paddled me around the rest of the caves, not knowing I was very nervous inside.

What Else

What else did I do?

I rode a horse!
This is me and Billy. She is 19 years old.

I thought I can play cow boy. But Billy has a mind of her own and I could not really control her.
My saddle was also not adjusted properly. So whenever Billy starts to trot at a faster pace, I will bounce up and down. Next day, I kar chen pain.

A beautiful view looking down at Patong Beach.

This is the nice thing about being able to ride around on your own on a bike at Phuket.
I can stop anywhere I like. To take pictures. Or to look and buy things which catch my eye. Or to eat and taste interesting food.















I will leave you with this beautiful photo of the setting sun at Patong Beach!

Tire Pom Jek

04 March 07, Sunday

I was riding in the middle lane of AYE at 10 am. The road was light in traffic.
Then suddenly I hear a muffled "POMP!" sound. Like somebody just burst a small plastic bag below my bike.

But nothing happened to my bike.
I rode on a short distance and thought, "Better check my bike to be safe."

I pulled to the road shoulder on the left and checked.
Nothing wrong leh.

Then I started to move off. I felt the bike moved-off was slighly wobbly.
Maybe I was just imagining. Maybe not. I side-standed again and check for any damage.
Nothing.

Then I start to move off again. Now the wobbliness is more obvious.
Something is wrong. I check the front tire. No damage. Check the front forks. No damage.
Then I check the rear tire.















Basket! The rear tire kena puncture!

The POMP sound must be my tire kena something and burst.
Despite the sound, good thing the puncture does not destablise my bike, until the air ran out of the tire.
I remembered some time ago, there was a discussion by some bikers that a biker fell off because his tube-full tire in his small kup kia bike punctured and he was thrown off the bike.
Someone said tubelss tires, which are used in most spokeless bikes in modern and especially big cc bikes, will not burst even if kena puncture.
So my this incident validated that tubeless tires are indeed safer.

BTW, my tires are Bridgestone Battleaxe BT-o20 sport touring tires.
I highly recommend them for sport tourers and long-distance tourers.
They provide more than enough grip for road cornering. Grips well dry and wet.
And they last long. My last 20,000 km liao. And looks good for another 5,000 to 8,000 km.

I told a friend that my bike kena puncture.
Wah, she very resourceful. Knows that can call LTA (1800-CallLTA) and ask for EMAS.
EMAS got free towing service.

I immediately call. Really EMAS provide free towing service if you breakdown along the expressway! But alamak, they kiam siap lah. Only tow you until the nearest expressway exit, to the nearest petrol kiosk or carpark. No use to me. I still need to get someone to tow my big bike to a bike mechanic to have my tire replaced or mended.

So I called a bike towing company to come tow for me ($30).

Frost stranded along the AYE with a tire pom jek (puncture).
Strike 4D also not so zun.

Sad to leave my frost without me. I immediately felt like a bird with its wings clipped.
Today and tomorrow no bike to ride around.