Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Ciao amici!

Hello! my friends

Just call me HAPPY:) . Endlessloop is a very good friend of mine. Though we knew each other barely for a year, we clicked very well… guess... one of the reasons is we are both quite “xiao”.

FYI, in case you think I am another of your biking flock. Sorry hor! I am a chio speed “demon-lass” who get the kick out of speeding down major expressways in my red chii beamer!




Never thought of sharing my dark kept secrets of how I haunt road-users esp. the motor bikers till one fine day, my good “bruther”, Endlessloop, as usual, came to my office (I think my good friend needs his regular dosage of eye candy), “ponk” himself comfortably on the chair in front of my desk and in his very MCP mannerism told me (I really mean “tell me” not “ask me”) that I should be his guest blogger.

If he had stared into my eyes intensely with his cute doggie eyes, I would have said YES straightaway…. Moreover, No $$. No Honey.

Anyway, to cut the long story short, I am here after being bribed with 3 gifts.

If you are a regular visitor to Endlessloop blog, you should know that he created the “Hazard-Oriented Vision Theory” and is a goody-goody law abiding biker, a role model commonly cited by the TP ( Traffic Police or Ti-ko Pek??!!)….. Whereas I am totally the opposite from him. Outwardly, people tell me I am demure, feminine, gentle, cultured and did I mention chio? But in actual fact, I am a hell rider on the road who get a kick out of “qionging” red lights!!

Let me share with you my self-developed H2K2H2 driving theory tips on how to “Qiong” red lights. For those who

has “P” plate on yr car
Ride less than 1000cc bikes or less than 1000cc cars
Never drive on extreme right lane before
Never clock more than 60km/h
Never overtake other cars before
Will “ka-rang ka-bo” when see amber lights
Stop for birds to cross the road
Cannot tell the difference between a traffic police bike or a CISCO bike

These tips are not for u cos’ either you have roads~phobia or are above 50 years of age or drive not more than 20 times per year or belong to the majority blur~like~sotong women drivers.

I heard you asking me what H2K2H2 stands for?

Make a guess? Guess correctly you get a ride on my chio beamer with a chio bu beside you.

Show you my nicely manicured finger to entice you :)

Cannot guess huh?

Give hint? Clue?


Hmmmmm…..


Sorry! Happy :) will only tell u next time.


Ai ya! So late liao! I share the tips with you next time la.


So come back and read Endlessloop blog and look out for my next entry.


I WILL BE BACK!!!


Happy :)

P.S for those ah mohs or non-Singaporeans out there, let me explain what those red italics mean
Xiao~ Patient who just escape from mental hospital
Hor~ yawn
Chio~ things that cause you to drool
Chio bu~ another Ms. Universe but minus the upsize cup.
Chii ~ Chilli buddy red
Bruther ~Bi-sexual; brother with sister nature
Ponk ~ action + sound made by a droopy butt sitting heavily on the chair
Qiong or Qionging~ dash ahead like a headless chicken

Ti-ko Pek~ man fonds of exposing his genitals anywhere, anytime, anyhow
Ka lang ka bo ~ in fits
Blur like sotong ~ a land creature with multiple tentacles that cannot get accustomed to life above sea cos it was migrated from the ocean.
Ah-mohs ~ Caucasians or those Chinese who can’t speak Mandarin





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